Hello , my fellow brave human

Have you ever felt like you’re balancing on the edge of a cliff, with everything you’ve planned suddenly thrown into chaos?

That moment when you know your life is about to change?

My father announced in the New Year that he wanted to move to the same village as me, wanting to be closer. Shortly after my mother-in-law died, we put his house on the market, and it was sold in a week.

We then discovered the house he had fallen in love with here had been sold to someone else without us being notified. He now had to move, but didn't have anywhere to move into (he didn't want to move in with us). So we found him temporary lodgings with friends as his moving-out date approached. Coming up for 80, uncertainty like this is very disconcerting for him. 

For me, as a daughter, there were conflicts of the potential burden of responsibility, and oh my goodness, how much is my life about to change?

Hold your nerve.

The first house we went to visit was snapped up by someone else within an hour. The second house a beautiful little cottage near to us with a wonderful view, and a little space I could use as an office so I can spend time with him without being in his way.

Amazingly, our offer was accepted this week.

This is a great example of the turbulence that I have been witnessing over the last few months everywhere. Holding your nerve is about knowing what could be possible. I’m finding myself having to do it in every area of my life (including The Brave Collective!)

When we approach things with fear, everything changes. When you surrender to the outcome, whatever that outcome is, you appreciate it more.

The Art of Surrendering Control

We often think of "holding our nerve" as gritting our teeth and pushing through. But I've come to understand it differently. It's about maintaining faith in the process while releasing our death grip on exactly how things should unfold.

With my father's move, I found myself caught between worry about the logistics and fear about how my own life would change. Would I suddenly become a full-time carer? Would our relationship dynamic shift in uncomfortable ways? At times, these anxieties clouded my ability to see possibilities.

It wasn't until I surrendered—truly let go of my need to control every aspect of this transition—that solutions began to appear. The temporary lodging with friends. The unexpected perfect cottage that emerged just when we needed it.

Fear Constricts, Surrender Expands

I've noticed this pattern repeatedly throughout my life: when I approach a situation with fear, my world becomes smaller. Options disappear. Everything looks like a threat.

But when I surrender to the process—acknowledging that the outcome might not match my expectations but could still be wonderful—the universe seems to expand. Opportunities arise that I couldn't have imagined. People offer help I didn't know to ask for.

With my father's move, surrendering didn't mean giving up on finding him a home. It meant releasing my tight grip on how and when it would happen, trusting that if we remained attentive and open, the right solution would emerge.

And it did. Phew!

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Dates for Your Diary

Walk & Talk

Friday 11th April - “Purpose and Perspectives” Valley Walk Set Aside at Greenlawdean Farm, Greenlaw, an eco-tourism project (that I’m also working on).

Book Walk & Talk

Brave Retreat (Advance!)

Saturday 26th April - Phenzhopehaugh, Ettrick Valley. A combination of walking, talking, and workshopping. Connection to yourself, to others and understanding the role you play in this mad world we live in.

This Advance Day isn't about having all the answers. It's about creating a safe haven where we can acknowledge the challenges while remembering our capacity to meet them.

Perhaps you're feeling drained by trying to make a difference. Maybe you don't yet fully recognise your unique gifts. Or possibly you're simply seeking like-minded souls who understand that rebuilding requires both vision and community.

Investment: £50

Book Retreat (Advance!) Day

As ever, join us on the Be and Build journey to explore how to be the brave you were born to be. I have a couple of spots left to start at the end of May

Here’s to your brilliance.

Kirsty x